• White House Correspondent

Clinton apprehended at White House

WASHINGTON DC—The White House went into emergency lockdown mode in the early hours of yesterday morning with the discovery of three intruders in the President’s bedroom. Fortunately President Obama and his family were out of town at the time.

Hillary Clinton’s campaign team were keen to distance themselves from the incident when it was revealed that one of the intruders was Bill Clinton. Unnamed security sources claim that the ex-President was accompanied by two representatives from IKEA’s flooring department.

According to the sources, Mr. Clinton was looking through carpet swatches when the armed emergency team burst in. He proclaimed his innocence by yelling at them that it wasn’t his fault that the locks hadn’t been changed in twenty years.

A spokeswoman for Mr. Clinton was keen to stress the positives – “He’s just a little excited at the thought of moving back in, and wants to make sure everything is to his liking before that happens.”

The White House issued a statement admitting that it wasn’t the first time Mr. Clinton had been apprehended in the building. Last month he was caught in the Lincoln Room stripping wallpaper.

Last night the IKEA reps were still at large.



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